I think it’s that time again to share with you some of the personal ramblings that have been plaguing my mind recently.

The last three months have been a bit of a roller-coaster. I feel disloyal by not sharing the reasons, but some things are just personal and private, and something I promised myself is that this blog would be a place of positivity and not a diary where to complain.

With all difficult times, come lessons. And lessons are the things that ultimately make you grow and turn you into a stronger person. Misadventures by themselves don’t do that. You could be sitting there feeling despondent, harbouring anger or resentment, but unless at some point you take one step back to analyse the situation, you will have learnt absolutely nothing.

It’s taken me months to get to this stage, so today I want to share the lessons I’ve learnt, hoping somehow that writing them down will create that invaluable mark in my brain that will not allow me to ever forget them…

The value of good friends

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I have, for many years, shunned away from the opportunity of creating life-long friendships. And this was totally my fault. Fear of experiencing loss and disappointment again can be quite paralysing sometimes. Real friendships have the power to break your heart, just like a lover can. It’s about the time, passion and energy you’ve invested in a friendship. The more you’ve put into it, the more you’ve got to lose. I’d lost in the past, and it hurt. And I just didn’t want to experience that pain again. In the 11 years I’ve been in the UK I’ve met some incredible people, but by the very nature of London, people come and go. So the best way not to ever have to miss anyone is not to get too attached to anyone in particular… Right? Wrong. At the end of the day, the barrier that I’ve put up has only served to hurt myself in the long run. And so, recently, I’ve rediscovered the pleasure of investing 100% into friends again. Unfortunately the ones that feel like blood brothers & sisters are far away from me, so no matter how much I speak to them, the quote above is truer than ever. Having them by my side would make me the happiest. But the bottom line is, I’m the happiest person ever to have a husband who is my best friend, and a small bunch of friends, far away and non, that I can truly call brother and sisters.

Life’s meaning

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Selfish people, people that use you and abuse you, people that pretend to be what they’re not because they need something from you, people that take and never give, people that have the power to make you feel ignored, do not have a meaningful life. It’s actually a sad, pathetic, lonely existence. Sometimes caring for others comes with pain and tears. But it’s worth every sleepless night. Nothing else to say. It’s as simple as that.

Don’t take small acts of kindness for granted

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There have been moments in the past three months that I had forgotten how to be lovable. And the negativity spinning around my head led me to believe that some of the people that are supposed to care for me, maybe didn’t. If only I took the time to pay attention to their actions, I would have clearly seen that this was utter nonsense. Just because I feel the need to express my love for others, it doesn’t mean that those who don’t, love me any less. Actions speak louder than words. Always. And you know what? If people stand by your side even when you’re not particularly lovable, you should be seriously grateful. I know I am.

Don’t take yourself too seriously

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Literally and metaphorically, not taking ourselves too seriously is the key to a content heart. When I was on one of those boats in this picture (btw, all of these images are from my collection taken in Sharm El Sheikh back in November), I was roped in to dance with the little boat captain just before we got back to the harbour. Unfortunately for me, there is a video of that embarrassing moment, but every time I watch it, it actually makes me happy. I was so relaxed that I actually busted some of the most ridiculous dance moves you’ll ever see. The reason? When you make a fool of yourself and you let your guards down, chances are everyone else will join in the fun and love you a little more. Life is so much more enjoyable when you don’t take yourself too seriously. You will not hastily take offence and it helps you to keep your feet and your head firmly on the ground. And ultimately, everyone who feels like you will be drawn to you, which, you never know…might lead to some more incredible friendships.

So, I wonder, what are some of your most valuable life lessons? Is there anything that you wish you’d realised a long time ago? I’d love to hear from you 🙂

Baci e abbracci, Betta

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